I am, What I am

" I am, what I am"

Mysore  is a beautiful place and the climate is also very pleasant. I was camping there for my official work .  My boss also reached there on the last day of my tour for the inaugural function of a programme  called " Educational   utilization of standards". My boss was a simple pious balanced person who used to speak many languages including Malayalam, English, Tamil, Hindi   and of course  Kannada. A good gentleman who always encouraged youngsters.

I remember I was into my 3rd year of my career and was trying to   Impress my seniors with my hard work.  Having been brought up in malayalam medium, it was bit difficult for me  to speak english fluently and also to pronounce  correctly. ( even now it has not changed much. May be this incident could be the reason) . 

After  the  the inauguration, the technical seminar began and  I also had a session to speak on technical subject.  Senior level people including my boss was sitting in front and I was trying to explain the concepts  in my own way.  

Suddenly it happened. One senior ( by age)  participant   got up from the front seat and said " This boy's accent is difficult to understand. He is speaking in Malayalam accent.I am not able to understand.  Let someone else explain the subject. ".   I was shocked, I could not do say anything and stood there silently. Even the people in the hall were shocked and totally silence prevailed ..,,

Immediately my boss stood up  and spoke loudly and furiously ." This organization is a national organization and we have people from all over  the country. " Punjab, Bengal, Maharashtra , Karnataka , kerala , Delhi and even from north Eastern states.  They have been brought up in their states and they will speak in their tone and accent . They carry the culture of their  state and our unity in this diversity is our  strength. . He is speaking in his accent because he was born in kerala and brought up there. Rather than the accent, the content is more important  and If you do not want to sit and listen to the important issues, you may   please go out. Let others hear him. He cannot change the way he is speaking and we must not insist on it."

Another shock and total  silence again.  He did not go out, but sat there Without further uttering a word. After the programme was over, I met him and  apologized  to him for what had happened.   This incident gave an indelible mark in my attitude towards my own individuality  because that was the time I was struggling to create a false identity for me which compelled me to imitate the imaginary person. . I was not confident enough to speak out in my own way and  thought  American accent is only best way to speak. 

But that day it was all over. My boss words had instilled confidence in me and  slowly erased the false fancies. Today when I look back I realize everyone is different and perfect in that specification.  " I am, what I am  with all my disabilities."  I realized  my tongue, my tone, my accent, my look, my Colour, my words   will identify me as and it shall remain as the original. 

That incident was also a revelation to  me that my boss also accepted me as I Was. from then onwards, I also started accepting the people around me as they are with all their differences. The  differences will remain and has to remain as it is.

I dedicate this blog to my boss who is living in bangalore as a tribute to his remarkable wisdom ,the truth. 

Regards,Varghese Joy